If that's d only way...

So i've tried every possible means i could but still the luck is not on my side. Takper, do it my way then if that's the önly way. Alrightyyy...

--Sent via N95 dlm keter dpn kedai total tools.

Linger on, linger on

Actually semalam aku ada dapat news yg tak baper best...ala-ala bad news la if i were to interpret it my way...work-related laa apa lagi...sometimes things work nicely, sweetly and juicily *tu diahh!* that u cant help wondering what good deed have u done in your life to deserve that...but other times they just dont eh? we just cant have it all, so they say...yes? aaaanyyywayyy...with regards to the one frustration that i got yesterday, i have one more mean to try...trying my last luck on this...didnt they say, 'try trying?'....hrmm..

Ginilah semangat tu....jatuh bangun jatuh bangun....takperlah tak kira lah baper kali jatuh bangun pon, hopefully in the end it'll all be mine..so ingatlah pelajar2 yg tgh struggle sekelian, dont lose your semangat belajar tu...skali ia hilang..letihhh weii nak cari balikkkk...eh tapi kan, aku tingat ada senior sorang dulu penah cakap...blajar macam apa yg aku blajar nih kena bersedia terima criticism, dissapointment, rejection regularly...ingat tu..

sigh sigh.....jadi, kayuhlah kamu sebelum kamu dikayuhkan...opsss...aper2 pong aku dah tingin laksa laks dah niiii...harus kena mencari daun kesom weken nih...

Vacation

Ayyohhh..harini aku dread and bosan betul nak buat kejer... sampai2 kat school jer terus dah rasa cam lemah semangat taktau naper...baru on computer jer, mentara dia nak up and running aku dah ngeluh bagai dah...iskk.. agaknyer sbb knowing ada berderetan kejer/task nak kena buat kot....aku dah buat experimen la..(applicable to me, dunno  if it applies to others though). That, kalau terlalu panjang beno list task nak kena buat in a day..terus dan dan tu rasa semput dan ilang semangat nak buat kojer..adoiii..so biorlah max takat 5 ajork.. aper?? 5 pon byk eks?? kannnn.. potong, tinggal 3 jer max task in a day to do. aper??? sikit sangat?? hahaha..ikut suker laaa..hehehe

hrmm..tu lah...haihhh..aku rasa cam nak kena gi bercoti-cotian lah eks...ermmm when was the last time i had my vacation? i mean real vacation tha tdoesnt involve work at all??? lama dah kan... like a year ago eh?? gold coast kan? ermm...about time for one laaa.... tp time xmas nih idak ker mahai segala2nya ngan flight ticket, accomodation and sewa keter?? aku nak gi tasmania laaa.....or melbourne ker....tp lom buat homework aper2 lagi nih...tak sempat sgt..adoihhh..hrmmm...

The rest is still unwritten

Try trying

...trying, i can see that!

Meet me, let me

Writing already?

Owh lupa nak citer, hr jumaat hr tu jumpa sv. Dia dah soh aku start writing dah mentara data collection berjalan, buley? Macam tau2 je plan aku nak melepak nov-dec nih. Cehhh.

--Sent via N95 kat sofa laks haha

Heaven or boredom?

Bosan giler la pulak ni, baru setengah hari. Keje purposely tak bawak balik sb ingat nak lepak2 je la weken ni. Udah rasa empty laks but to walk to school, i'm too lazy. Amran ajak gi total tools *hello kedai tools what?? Haha* maleh nak ngekor. Jadi, facebooking like crazy, cook curry laksa, mafia wars, you tube-ing, cafe world, read new moon, watch bruce willis in die hard, and updating this while lepaking on my super comfy bed. Now, is that heaven or boredom?

---Sent via N95

Next week! next week!!

geng-geng sydneysider, jom next week???!! jom jom jommm!





buku hat ni lom abih baca agih..





yang ni laagii la berabuk huhuuu..last one nih

Sajer gi godek youtube pepagi..tak sangka laks terjumpa sequel twilight nyer trailer! huhuu layann la kejap....ermm weken ni cam free ja laks takdak agenda nih...berehat-rehat kat umah jer lah rasanya..

Harini takder aper sangat lah...bebel-bebel ajer..

My analysis is done and it shows good basic standing....reliability, validity, normality of all items measured sumer okke-okke ajer alhamdulillah....cuma still aku rasa macam ada nak kena tambah2 sket lar dekat expected output dia. In other words, biorlah dapat lebih sikit outcome dia just to be prepared of. Bior ada lebih menda yg nak diciterkan dpd tak cukup laks kang kan..apa aku cakap nih? things are never enough eh? sigh sigh..then setel nih buleh dah start letak menda alah ni online....owh bayaq pon belum lagi no. owhh nak kena cari agen kat mesia pon lom agik no....data collection aku nih akan byk pakai duit nih....iskk ada menda agik lom setel nih especially tedious procedure cam gini...sigh sigh....

Neway, giving it a month or 2 the maximum *adoiii berharapan tinggi betui aku nih!*, now makes me think apa aku nak buat eks mentara nunggu nih? nov and dec..hum hum...no matter what it's gonna be.....please, please, pretty please God make this data collection process successfully done and over with in dec..amin amin amin...otherwise i'll be frantic all over again..this is the stage where i'll have to leave to luck & fate (in other words, tawakkal & ikut rezeki) for things to come my way....got no control in this one.

owhhh..dah tau dah apa nak buat mentara tu..kemas mejaku ittew...takkan sampai 2 bulan eks...haha...byk keje ooo...nak put things together, group them, nu them, label them, keying in them, then susun them dalam kotak, not to mention to screen them beforehand...arghh just thinking about it has started to make me feel nauseous....lama dah tangguh nih. nyah, meh sini tolong aku! so ingat2lah pelajar2 sekelian yg mana akan menggunakan banyak gaban papers/journals utk keje tu...be systematic and organized right from the beginning ok! dont be like me hoho...want tips of how to? private message me....hehe

Calling out, falling out

Mengujakan!

My stage 1 data collection is now complete thank God. At the moment I'm running the analysis and this should be done in few days time. The result should give me some insights and provide me signals if i can move on to my stage 2 data collection. Now stage 2 is even scarier coz this time it involves total strangers. The preliminary procedure on this one is settled and all prepared....just waiting for this stage to be launched. Looks promising but can't really tell just yet....hope it will go well...

Nope bukan ni laa yg mengujakan..hehe..ok ok teruja gaks la to be fair kan..looking forward but dreading? huhuu..

I hear news and plans are in progress now ehem ehem. Geng-geng kelate nun tengah dok plan to come here downunder somewhere in easter next year. Mengujakan! They asked me for the time that i'm gonna be free and available. Memang tokleh nak cakap bab ni as i really can't tell. So i suggest might as well datang somewhere in march-april lah alang2 sbb ada easter show masa tu. Buleh gaks bawak depa gi show tu and to me, show easter tu interesting. It could give a snapshot exposure of all & about of oz. Weather laks dah nak start sejuk2 nyaman masa tu.

In fact, dah bermain2 dah di fikiran aku..nak bawak depa gi mana eks...nak sewa keter yg camana eks..perhaps one 7-seater kot *sbb dengo2nyer more than 2 couples plan to come, not to mention yg single*..to the point that, nak allocate depa ni tido mana eks..saper tido master bedroom *harus kaum isteri & singletons!*, saper kat hall depan tv *harus kaum suami!* dan saper kat study room *harus kaum yg nak kena tido ngan anak!* huhuuuu mmg mengujakan jadiknya! Both of us are thrilled already thinking about this! Harap2 menjadi lahh depa datang...tapi aku tau kalau fairos yg lead on their side, harusss jadi. Dengo2 nyer dah nak start collect duit monthly & ada bendahari yg akan tolong pegang duit. So that time nak mari sok dak la terkezut banget poket tu kan..mmg kitaorg nyer plan selama ni pong mmg ada task allocation that each participating member will be in charged of. Skema sangat kan bunyi nyer??

Iyerrr...tapi tetappp mengujakannn!! Ok ija now stop feeling excited. Face the unexcited! haha.. off to school...hehehe..oh well, u know how we need excitement and something to look forward to everyday to get us going, yes? no?? for me at least..

The card

"Ahh there's a card!"

"Owh? Who would give you a card?? Must be someone silly!"

*Opens the card*

"My myyy..such beautiful words.."

"Owh? Must be from someone beautiful!"

Happy birthday b*ernardo!! 

Heaven

okess dah dapat dah lagu nih..satu ni jer ada online. Tu pon kat imeem, sekerat jer leh dengo altho kat imeem nun leh dengo full. tu pong lagu ni dah remix bagai dah.

******

"Heaven" - Nu Flavor

Heaven, heaven oh heaven cant you help me
I looked in her eyes now shes all I see
Heaven oh heaven cant you help me

First time I saw you girl,
You turn me upside down
I can't stop thinking bout you
My head is spinning round
I got to find away to get with you somehow
Girl I'm so crazy for you
You know I want you now
And every minute of every single day
I'm dreaming of how it could be
And every night before I go to sleep
I'm praying that soon you'll be here with me

[Chorus]
Heaven, heaven oh heaven cant you help me
I looked in her eyes now shes all I see
Heaven oh heaven cant you help me
I'm down on my knees please, heaven

Cant fall alseep tonight
I don't know what to do
I hold my pillow but I wanna be holding you
And when close my eyes I always see your face
I know my happiness is only a kiss away
And every hour here in the dark
Every beat of my lonely heart
Tells me that I need to be with you
Heaven oh heaven what can I do

[Chorus]
Heaven, heaven oh heaven can't you help me
I'm giving my love for eternity
Heaven oh heaven can't you help me
I'm down on my knees please help me

[Instrumental]

Girl I'd give anything if you were here with me
Give anything you want and anything you need
I never thought that I could feel the way I do
But now I wanna spend the rest of my life with you
And every day that we are apart
I'm shedding this love here in my heart
And everynight before I go to sleep
I'm praying that soon you'll be here with me

[Chorus]
Heaven, heaven oh heaven cant you help me
I looked in her eyes now shes all I see
Heaven oh heaven cant you help me
I'm down on my knees please, heaven

Help me pls? pretty pls??

Bangun-bangun jer pagi tadi terus rasa mual2 nak termuntah..terus ke toilet bowl dan uwek uwek *hihihi sorry sesaper tengah makan tu huhuu*...then perut rasa tak sedap, badan terus rasa tak sihat....bahu, tengkuk dan kepala rasa strain sangat...ni simtom aper? high blood? mmg seminggu dua ni dok melayang2 dah dan kepala kerap berpusing2..owh no! bukan kepala aku yg berpusing laaa hahaha..itu macam kalu, hantu laa aku nih kekeke..penin daaaa.....dan slalunyer kalau gini, it shows aku tgh low blood..sokmo gitu..tp ni sakit2 sengal2 bahu laks nih..uhukkk *okey okey, enough hints for me to be sympathized huhuu*...hehehe tapi betul laaaa..ada kureng sket rasa..macam tertekan jer..taktau apa yg aku tertekan kan...ditekan tu sokmo laaa opsssss.ok ok..

hrmmm...i thought students dont have monday syndrome?? i thought they have everyday syndrome one?? so why oh why do i feel today's different than other days? ok membebel lagi.

neway, my main point of today's entry is...i wanna get help from you to get me the title of this song. Bagi tajuk & penyanyi dia cukup, nanti aku search la kat youtube ker imeem ker mixpod ker. Aku dah lamaaa cari lagu ni but damn the tajuk doesnt want to come to my mind! Ni lirik dia..music dia pon aku ingat tp tajuk and penyanyi mmg tak mari punyer. Kalau dapat nanti aku letak lagu ni kat blog.

heaven..

heaven oh heaven can you help me..

i looked in her eyes..

now she's all i see..

heaven oh heaven..

can u help me...

err..btw, not sure lyric tu tepat ke dak pon..tp rasanya cam lebih2 kurang tu gaks lah...tolong eks somebody? somebody out there can u hear me?? echooo.....uhukk *and relate this with the first para hehehe*

sigh...okeh daaa..off to work! it's gonna be a long day for me...

Updates

..status updates should be able to give a glimpse of what's been happening eh?

~ headache..

~ cold and very windy..

~ the sky outside looks good with the sun shines bright this morning...let's have some ice creaaammmmm!

~ mana nak dapat dossier on dmitri nih?? uhukk..*opsssss*

~ there goes my weekend...

~ grgrgrgrgrgr....

~ hope soars high

~ better tired than lazy....or is it?

~ mood kurang..

~ thank God dalam aku takde2 mood ni good news keep on coming in..syukur..

~ amazed at how things that seemed impossible before are now possible! nothing is impossible and anything is possible...thank God for making me see..*most recent*

*punyer ler maleh nak nulis kan? hehe*

happy weekend ols!

Use somebody

Wild World - Mr Big

To be with you - Mr Big

Tired & Thots

This past week i've been very busy doing the data collection process. Still going on. Penatnyerrr...hrmm.. although penat tp i think i prefer this one better sbb this involve operationalization of my work..so meaning, less work to sit and read and write huhuu..at least some break la kejap before coming back to that process again kan..

Struggling jugak aku ngan procedure dia. Nak dapatkan contact..send messages..reminder messages..not to mention counting on hopes every single day. To the point that i subscribe to get email prompt email from my mobile! Sebelum ni aku malas nak buat sbb ntah..macam mengganggu ketenangan laks time-time aku away from computer or laptop. Tapi, since i'm running after time (bukan run out of time yea..), so needed to do this. Cam best laks kejap2 tringgg..kejap2 tringgg henfon aku haha.. idak kalu, senyap ajork.. saper lah sangat nak calling2 or sms-ing2 sini..the function for my phone here has been much, much less than before. Yang wajib2 jer skrg...nak wat camner..

Neway, what makes me write harini nih? hrmm..sebab tadi tanya faizah something related to work..sementelah tu, catch up on each other's updates...biasa la this and that, catching up on study progress. She's much senior in terms of study than me and now in the writing stage already. So i asked her just now, "do you find writing difficult?"...kind of anticipating of what to expect next year la lebih kurang. Dia kata, "now i know it isnt easy to put down thoughts on paper"..after she said that..suddenly a thought crossed my mind for a brief moment that, "ermm..maybe i shouldnt stop blogging after all..it could help me practice writing"..minah tu terus teruja bila aku speak my thoughts out...walaubagaimanapun, meks bz sgt and no interesting story to tell pon sini.

A note

Of why i close my blog

No specific reason, no intruders, no harassment..just simply bosan. I am like bored writing a blog already...dunno why..but i know i still need this blog for the utmost reason of its existence in the first place. So, nope...am not closing this blog forever and nope, am not moving to other blog either. Will still be this one..just taking my time to relax a bit. Besides, i also need to focus more time on my research work...tedious and tough job on this one that i might abondon my blog for a while. So i thought might as well close it for the mean time. Till later.

Miracles do happen

**entry bebelan kategori random nothing...a boring one lemme warn you**

Miracle kadang2 happen dalam waktu2 yg kita tak jangka kan? Maksudnyer, bila kita berharap-harap sangat for things to happen..like anticipating it so much... tak dapat laks apa kita nak..tapi bila kita tak jangka, time tu lah jadik nyer kan?

Masa aku apply working visa utk amran masa mula2 datang haritu (local gov)....it is well known that the procedure akan amik masa seminggu after submission of the form (online). Aku remember masa tu aku tengah kalut busy ngan kelas Ian yg aku baru sampai 2, 3 hari ke aussie masa tu. Still stay kat mesia hall (for a month, sbb tak dapat2 agik rumah..asyik fail or kalah jer bila compete ngan applicants lain). So i still remember aku submit working visa application for amran ni (yer aku ni PA dia haha) di sebelah malam dalam kol 9pm gitu lepas balik dari kelas, lepas kalut2 ribut cari artikel and prepare utk kelas Ian dan lepas dinner sumer. Tak la rush sangat nakkan amran keje..sbb amran pon ingat nak relaks2 dulu masa sampai sini memula dulu. Member nak lepak few months katanya dulu before keje tp aku proceed jugak apply visa tu awal2 senang citer.

Neway, esok pagi cek email..tup tup dapat dah reply dari immigration, approving his application! Can you imagine...aku submit kol 9pm smlm nyer..and got approval reply awal pagi lepas subuh masa tu (tabiat aku mengecek email nih secelik mata aku). Punyer ler terkejut..like, kol baper officer ni buat keje kan?? yg ni mmg aku tokleh lupa...sbb tu bila ada member yg baru sampai aussie tanya aku baper lama to apply for working visa...i would always say, seminggu normally tp if miracle happen, you can get the result overnight jer...

Second case, ethics application. Memang ikut procedure..1-2 weeks...most of my colleague dapat 7 days after submission.. Aku tang ni, same case gaks...and one of the things yg aku tokleh lupa jugak...meeting for it hari jumaat (mtg depa on this mmg every friday each month),..tup tup sabtu dalam kol 11 pagi tu aku dah dapat result...kiranya, officer in charge nih keje overnight and on saturday gaks la kan...tak la berkira sangat keje depa nih pon (tapi bunyi nama macam india instead of local aussie..local aussie harus la pemalas kot..walaupon tak semua)....Ada la minor correction sana sini kat form aku tu...resubmit balik belah petang, the next day morning dapat approval dah. Bila citer kat bernardo, dia pon heran...tapi dia kata agaknye lelaki ni (as the person in charge is a male) keje lebih rajin dan efficient kot.. entah! Neway, i take it as rezeki and good luck la eks..

Third case, my coach bag in a coach drama remember? hehehe...

I guess what i'm trying to say is....on top of usaha, doa lah banyak2.....we never know when our wish will be granted...just have faith on what we want (as long as it is the right thing to do/ask)...and then have faith that our wish will be granted one day. Cakap mmg senang..berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu memikul...it is indeed difficult to pull yourself up especially during those difficult times. Orang boleh kata, be strong..be strong..tabah and all...tapi diri sendiri yg akan tau how strong we could be kan?...diri sendiri jer yg tau how low we have been kan?

Sememangnyer luck kita lah with who we're dealing with everyday..if good luck, we got the best ones who tolerate well and give in to our weaknesses but other times, we could be dealing with the total opposite..ngan racism (if & maybe), bias, pilih kasih, making ppl's life difficult & miserable, emotional tahap cipan etc etc. Nasib lah..just work yourself forward...just remember, although we are experiencing pains...we dont have to be a pain in the ass to others too...whatever it is, i am blessed to have good people around me with the support and all...

You guys might think these are small issues that i share here but they certainly gives big impact to me...so, dear you (and dear me)..have faith ok? Miracles do happen...