The break off

Nak tau dak cemana aku break off ngan ex-boypren aku dulu? Taknak tau pon takper aku citer gaks! hehehe

Well...dulu2.. almost every other day di sepanjang bulan posa masa tu kannnn... aku asyik dapat mimpi2 tak elok about hubungan aku ngan dia..dont know why.. aku cam mimpi that shows i'm not gonna end up with him. Well, he was my first bf so obviously everybody would hope to end up with such person, kan? We were never in a bad kind of relationship.. elok and smooth ajer la...takde gaduh2 whatsoever.. tapi taktau kenapa i kept of getting nightmares that we will split! Takkan la subconscious aku berkehendakkan gitu kot because i know i dont. He didnt act wierd and so on...so..no signals at all except those nightmares. Dan aku ni pulak bukanlah jenis yg oberservant to this bit.. meaning, menyelami mimpi2 baik or buruk aku..dulu!

So, then after puasa nothing happen...elok jer semuanya.. raya pon aku gi umah dia.. first time aku gi umah dia jumpa mak dia...kat Andalas. Dia pon first time datang raya umah aku...kira, bila dah datang umah ni kan..dah kira first step dah la tu kan...and then life goes on cam biasa la....

Until one day masa dating kat Sunway Pyramid...masa lunch ker dinner ke makan petang kot tak ingat dah..tapi makan mee goreng share sepinggan! hehehe sbb byk mee mamak tu laa aku bukan habis *aku tak makan byk tauu huhu*. Anyway, masa tengah makan tu aku tergerak nak tanya dia sebaris ayat that supposedly got nothing to do with anything but never in my wildest dream it actually is the start of everything! I thought it was a mere conversation. I asked him..

.."ada apa yg tak kena? ada apa2 masalah ker?"..just that! It could mean anything, isnt it? it could mean the world.. like keje ke, keter ke, duit ker whatever not. Tapi dia diam jer masa tu so aku tak push.

Balik, masa kat parking keter.. he confessed! Just as simple as that...Apa yg dia confessed? Len kali aku sambung part nih hehe kalo mood mari hehehehe. Dalam berkawan, dia ni macam trust my instinct sket kot.. tapi menda yg aku tanya tu actually i got no clue at all. Aku tetiba terkeluor ajer sepatah tu and i guess mamat ni dia rasa bersalah and thought that i have such instinct of what was happening when in real, i dont!

We gave ourselves 2 weeks after that for deep thinking without any contact in between...tapi esoknyer boleh lak aku ikot dia gi tengok hoki mesia lawan india lagii!!

Anyway, in those 2 weeks, tanpa aku sedari apa yg ada dalam subconscious mind aku nih, aku telah pack things up..i mean segala menda alah yg dia penah bagi aku, aku pack and give him. So after 2 weeks, masa jumpa balik for any discussions or what not, i dont know where i got the courage to give him all those barang2. Termasuk cincin. *kawan baik aku kata masa tu..'awat hang bagi ija, baik hang pi leboq dapat gak duit kat hang* kekekek. Anyway, dia terkelu as in tak sangka aku boleh bagi dia barang2 which means i have made up my decision without discussing further with him. So he took the hint. Well, sebenonyer i kind of get what his decision would be dah. Masa tu tak nangis, syukur sangat at least i have any last straw of airmuka in front of him.. but of course balik bilik, banjir laaahhh kannnn hehehe seminggu tak makan nasi beb! makan buah betik jer sepotong sehari. Selim melim aku tuh!! huhuhuuu. Abah aku datang KL masa tu notice sesangat betapa selimnyer aku masa tu huhuu masa tu jer la boleh berbangga kuruih dalam masa singkat hehehe *seingatnyer 2 kali jer yg aku kuruih drastik; satu, aku dapat result gilos kat paper costing aku D, menangis tak berlagu aku! dan the other one, kes ni lah* hehehe

Don't speku naper aku citer ni tetiba..takde kaitan apa langsung dengan apa2 keadaan aku skrg nih.. it's just that this thing happen terjadi ber-ekoran bulan posa gaks and like i mentioned in my earlier entry.. i just got mellow a bit.

Anyway, kalau one day aku selak balik archive blog aku and terbaca citer ni and if i find it hurtful, i'll just delete this entry.

Happy weekend! *a bit too late for that already heeheh*