Semalam nyer citer

Yesterday we had a defense seminar again for Nui, a student from Thailand...ermm...bila tengok dia defend her work, rasa rasa macam i can do better than this hehehe..aku rasa ni first time that thought strike me sbb from previous ones, mmg takde konfiden langsung bila tengok org sumer buat bagus2 and kofiden abes! So macam lepas balik tuh, aku dok menung kejap..and macam rasa2 tau apa aku patut buat during my time nanti..and then aku ala-ala imagine success gitu la..then aku pon rangka2 dah aku nyer defense presentation outline padahal lambat lagi tuh!! kekekeke takper lah, something to look forward kan and i'm imagining and visualising success at my session there when the time comes...

In the morning, my sv datang sembang2.. well dia hanya nak sembang2 biasa jer....lama2 tuh aku masuk gaks bab2 keje aku sket....hrmmm.....aku actually ada sikit frustration lah ngan dia.. hrmm... tu lah dia.. tp malas nak elaborate kat sini...sure korang pon boring baca....tp ada sikit frust lah kan....

Aku masih dalam mood depress and down beno nyer since last week....u know the mood is on and off...on bila my mind keep on thinking on things that is bothering me and off when my mind is not thinking of it..such as when i read things other than my study *tu diahhh masalah nih! kekekeke* or i chat and then i smile and then was able to laugh..macam last weekend hari sabtu ke ahad ke..boring dan beku sangat, dok blog hop.. masuk ke blog si vaart...tah camana leh dok ralit baca archive blakang2 blog dia tuh.. mmg gelak sakan baca entry2 dia kekekeke successfully put my mind off my worry sekejap. kekekekek vaart!! gi hapdet lekaihhhh..iskk raya lom abes ker lagi tuh??? heheeh bukan dia baca pon blog nih kekekeke.

Pehtu, anothing thing that normally can enlighten my mood everyday selalunyer kan...every morning..aku akan bukak blind tu and renung kat luar tingkap.. skrg nih kol 5.30am plus gitu dah cerah..so syok rasa tengok morning sunrise, tengok pokok2 kat luar tingkap..ok lah.. then mood rasa tenang...pastu, jejak kan kaki keluar pintu building nih.. i would always pause for one or 2 seconds and tengok sekeliling alam sekitar.. nice! betul...mmg best rasa.. tenang dan nyaman.. langsung mood pon jadik nyaman..aku slalu buat camni...

It is not that i dislike my work, dont get me wrong.. i have always been passionate about my work..tp kadang2 bila otak jam, beku, worries bertapuk2..then org yg diharap guide kita pon macam tak guide jer...frust la gaks rasa kekadang...hrmm....aku consider myself jenis yg independent la jugak.. i mean, i know what i want and normally i know how to achieve what i aim for.. tapi.. at times, of kos perlu jugak guidance yg sebetulnyer yer dak....aku cuma bagi satu contoh jer la kat sini..aku tanya sv aku smlm "how's my methodology work? *yg aku submit 9/11! dan hanya 10 page ajer!*"... dan dia pause a second and then replied.."it was fine". Just that! so, can u imagine my frustration? tah dia baca tah idak tuh..

hrnm..wokesss laaa..daaaa