It's Friday already peeps!

Yeap, I dont know about u guys but I feel that time flies very fast nowadays.... and I believe in no time, I will see myself at the end of the year of 2008 already huh! Well...on one hand, I'd like that because it would mean shorter time for me to be back in the arms of my family... however, on the other hand...it will mean that my deadlines are coming really, really soon and I'd better wake up! Huhuuuu yeah... there are always pro and cons in everything u did....the good and the bad side...I remember how difficult it was for me to make the decision whether to come here or just do this locally.. and when mom didnt agree on my coming here, although I was not quite happy but obeyed anyway coz I have this conservative belief in me that mom knows best and I'd better not disobey my mom otherwise I'll be punished one way or another later on hahaha. Well.. laugh I may, but psttt... I still have that in me. So, till now, whenever I have presentations or exams I would call her up the day or night before just to get her restu or something like that.. at least her assuring words make me feel better...same case when I got good marks (tu yg 85%) tu, quickly enough I reported to her to which Delinn said .."such a baby!" hahahaha


Anyway, in the end mom agrees and finally with her consent.. here I am standing up to what I believed to be my destiny for my doctorate study since the very beginning... And.. now... with such difficulty.. I would say difficulty because.. I am in difficulty here.. not in my life-style Alhamdulillah....but.. in my studies..I ermmm ( this is the zillionnthhh of time I complained, I know yadda yadda yadda.. just bear with me..in 3.5 yrs time if I can still keep this blog.. it would be interesting to look back and reminiscing)... I ermmm.... ok to make it simple.. I feel incompetent relative to my other colleagues...but... I am still holding on to the saying.. "ada hikmah di atas segalanya..." that to date, haiyyohh study wise belum nampak huhuuuu... but lifestyle wise.. yeap.. bit by bit I can see what it meant to show/tell me...what I can say is... this environment teach me to appreciate things a whole lot more than I usually had


Yesterday, I attended a doctoral seminar in the afternoon.. it was basically a proposal defense by Zhi Rong who is doing something on product assortments and she is focusing on tourism.. how ppl decide their tourism assortment. I admire her.... I have so many times wished her luck prior to yesterday coz I know I'd be such a freak when I'm about to embark in such an important event of a PhD student's life...but.. yesterday.. she did good. She did very well. I observed how she did her presentation and although she kind of stumbled with her words here and there nevertheless she is one confident student! There were lots of questions posed... heaps of them! but she managed just fine..looked like she really really know what she's doing.. well.. of course at that point we should have, shouldnt we? That's obvious otherwise we wont be standing there..Ermm.. maybe because I still have vague picture of what I intend to do in my research.. Arghh...I just dont want to go beyond 4 yrs. That will be crazy!


I received good news from friends in NZ and Perth who came a month or 2 months later than me.. but already successfully defended their proposal last week.. Alhamdulillah... happy for them but makes me cringe inside when I look at my situation... Well.. one might say that they dont have classes (yes, true) therefore they are able...I dont know.. I always pray and hope that God give me hidayah in doing my work and hoping for miracle so that...when I do it the first time ( I mean the ideas, the work and all), it will be the right one so that my path is a straight one instead of crooked hehehe.. so that I wont waste my time hehehe...


Okay.. enough with my ramble on this... there will be other times of something like this believe me..so much with my emotions....


Can u believe that I only managed to finish only 1 Jack's article yesterday???? Such a loser huhuuuu sian diri aku nihhh asyik kene kutuk hahaha...no.. I mean.. such a kura-kura hahaha...yes.. I started the reading at 8+ am with large latte on my side (yg dalam minggu ni aku dah tak bancuh sendiri air neskepe dah..beli jer.. huhuu) and... when it was about to go back at 8pm yesterday.., I was still holding that same paper keh keh keh.. tak patut betullll.. tp....yeah.. I had to attend the seminar at 3.30pm yesterday anyway...alasan.. alasan..hiks!


But.. surprisingly this time... I think I understand the whole picture or idea of that paper in that one time reading, how's that?? huhuuuu... I mean.. boleh laaa nak draf2 or letak2 gambaran of how my answers would be... what my approach would be in answering the question.. in which aspect I would start tackling the question ..something like that.. cuma belum write up lagi.. tgh nak perabihkan whole 3 papers first then only write properly so that I get a clearer picture.


So, today am gonna (should) finish the other 2 papers and in the afternoon or tonite I should draft my answers in the paper already.. insyaallah.. see how. Then.. if everything goes to schedule.. tomorrow I'll look at Monday's article which to date havent received any yet.. tak suka betul depa ni bagi last last minit sbb I dislike to do last minute work.. makes me panic tak tentu pasal hisyyy.. and sunday there will be badminton game oh oh... yep, finally I confirmed with Zurin that i'Allah am coming with of course additional note .."cakap siang2 tak gheti main tau!" huhuuuu.. after the game, I shall be working on my SPSS assignment.. see how..


Ohh.. yesterday masa otak tgh kelabu asap with the reading, I dropped by at Joe's chatbox..which I seldom do... hrm... little did I know that it is fun chatting in the 'online crowd' hahahahaha...aku kan anti social sket hahaha dream on!


Oklah.. tu jer